Accepting and Embracing the Depressed Side of Ourselves

It takes great courage to accept and even embrace the depressed part of ourselves!

It can rear its head when we go through tough times which makes it understandable, but when it occurs during periods of time when “everything is going well” that makes it seem BAFFLING and so we REJECT it!

Depression is a signal our brains send us when something is out of alignment in our bodies and spirits, our very souls, so the work it takes to bring ourselves back into balance most likely will entail more than taking a pill!
Please note: If you’ve been diagnosed with a mental illness, don’t take my words here as permission to remove yourself from your medication, rather, that this article may touch something deep inside so you may start the journey of self discovery to tap into the hidden recesses, where dreams, hopes and pain we’d rather not face resides.
There isn’t ONE cause, since it speaks to each of our lives in very individual ways. 
Situational depression is easier to work on: change the circumstances and the spirit responds.
When there are deeper, soul issues which want to be looked at in order that we can heal, grow and move forward,  our spirits will start to bubble these up to the surface when we’re less stressed and hence more able to look at them! So what feels like a huge negative is really a symptom! It’s the way our soul taps us on our shoulders and gently says “it’s time! I need to look at this!”
In our culture we have come to associate these periods with something very negative happening so we do our best to push it away, take pills, drink alcohol, do drugs, or ANYTHING rather than looking inwards to see WHAT is the ROOT of this might be!
Messages we’ve received about our unworthiness, our inabilities, etc can be so ingrained that in the good times we can be overcome with negative thoughts about ourselves! You know the thoughts!”I really don’t deserve this good life!”, “I’m not worthy of good things!”, “I’m cursed!”, “Something bad will happen to those I love, so I refuse to tempt fate by being happy.”

Here’s a little secret! There may be only 1% truth in all that negativity! So 99% of it is PURE NEGATIVE HYPE!

By grasping courage in our hands and looking at the 1% clearly, we can find our own personal solution! 

Maybe we need to just accept ourselves, as being less than perfect? No one is perfect, no matter how good they are at projecting a smoke screen, so we can just STOP trying to be!

We ALL can IMPROVE! That’s HUGELY different! Baby steps are better than no steps, so, if all you can manage is a tiny baby step, then do it! After that, take another!

If that 1% is all about healing from past hurts and traumas, taking steps toward healing is a crucial part of our process!

Naturally, this article isn’t enough to heal anyone from depression… the purpose is to give encouragement to take those baby steps forward!

I’ve found that in my own journey with healing and dealing with my depressed thoughts is that truly there was only 1% truth to the internal negativity that was happening in my head! I focused on that tiny portion of truth and blew it up so that it became the enormous hammer I used to beat myself up with.

When I reached a point where I ACTIVELY worked on learning to ACCEPT and EMBRACE the depressed parts of me, I slowly withdrew my head from inside the shell I lived in, and learned that I’m a GOOD person, and that I really didn’t deserve to keep beating myself up!

Interestingly I heard that when we make a decision that WE HAVE SUFFERED ENOUGH, we can start to leave all the old negative inner thoughts behind. We give ourselves permission to heal, to be happy, to let go of past hurts, because we’re WORTHY of love, respect and acceptance, both from ourselves and from other people!

This is HUGE!

I was inspired to write this post when I read the very personal journey in “How to Live with Depression and Add Joy to Your Life” on the blog The BUSINESS of BLOOMING

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“You have compiled in one place an encyclopedia of knowledge with personal experience that touches the heart of women that no clinical approach can. Combined with what is spiritual, this is powerful…”

“I have the book in my kindle library and although I have read it three times, I go back to it whenever I can focus on its contents by subject and absorb what I need to remind me of my direction.”

“Thanks so much for putting your life experience and knowledge in a book for all to heal from including me as I continue to grow and become the person I knew was inside; the inside and outside are more in harmony. The work of healing is such a joyful thing now.”


4 thoughts on “Accepting and Embracing the Depressed Side of Ourselves

  1. I was so happy to read your article, Tamara! And I really liked the bit toward the very end: “Interestingly I’v heard that when we make a decision that WE HAVE SUFFERED ENOUGH, we can start to leave all the old negative inner thoughts behind.” So true..we have to decide that we don’t want the pain anymore! Great piece ❤


    • Thank you Marie!! Learning that thought was a huge pivotal moment for me! It really helped me turn that enormous ship I was piloting from very negative inner thoughts to positive ones! It took me quite a while to fully accomplish that since I had many deeply embedded tapes that went to the core of my soul.

      Even when we don’t feel we have the strength to do it, if we keep taking those baby steps we’ll still make progress!

      If we make baby steps and check in on ourselves in a week or a month, we might not be able to see enough progress to feel satisfied, but after a year we can see improvement! Then after two years we can see distance between who we currently are and who we were before!!

      Thanks for stopping by and talking!


      Liked by 1 person

      • Tamara, I’m sorry it took me a while to reply here! Yes, one more thing-how important it is, like you said, to not give up. It’s hard to notice the changes from a day-to-day basis, but that doesn’t mean they’re not happening. Thanks for being so positive and inspiring. Blessings to you ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks Marie! I appreciate your feedback! I made a vow a few years ago to be positive in how I responded to EVERYONE on all social media. I think I’ve been about 95% successful. Not everyone notices and some even just dislike it, but that’s their universe, it’s not mine!

        I’ve found that taking the time to frame things as positively and as encouragingly as I can that it boomerangs back to me and helps me to see the positive in even very negative situations. This helps keep my own depressed thoughts at bay.

        This is more than just feeling gratitude. It goes a step deeper in that it entails finding and seeking the positive possible solutions in a situation and focusing on those!

        This life tactic has paid off in the past couple of years when my daughter has had one roadblock after another interfering with buying a house. She has just signed on a house which means she can now find employment in our town instead of commuting and hour and a half away. This also means that I will be released from my commitment of taking care of the three kids , since she leaves at dawn and returns at 8:30 pm, so that I can go back to work myself.

        It would have been easy to get into negative thinking: she’s not meant to have a house, she’s cursed, etc!

        With each roadblock we did our best to find the positive nugget to be able to keep moving forward!


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