My History and HOW I became a Writer!

I never realized that I was an “Intuitive” who received powerful LIFE INFORMATION seemingly by osmosis… As an INTUITIVE who absorbed life lessons from a very young age, I didn’t realize until I was much older that it wasn’t “normal” to have my mother sit me down at the kitchen table with a cup of tea from the age of 8 or so, and ask me very deep questions about LIFE and what she needed to say and do in certain life situations!

I somehow just KNEW some information and being so young I couldn’t have learned it from life experience. However being so young I didn’t know how to put it in terms that gave her a choice, so when she put something into practice and it didn’t work out the way she wished, I got severely punished for “giving her the wrong information”. This was the start of shutting down my abilities because it became to be associated with physical pain of corporal punishment!

(In 2016, at the age of 54 I’ve finally reached a point of feeling courageous enough to reveal this part of me and to incorporate it into my message to you! I’ve had a few people tell me I have psychic abilities, to which I had IMMEDIATELY responded: “WHAT?!! That’s CRAZY! I can’t tell the future! I’m NOT a PSYCHIC!!” and put it out of my mind!)

I wish I knew then what I know NOW to REALLY help her, but she recognized my abilities as a TEACHER, and by the age of 15 I was teaching art classes in her 3 studios! As an intuitive the private art classes I later gave in my own studio naturally were imbued with art therapy individualized for each person. I intuitively knew how to help each person to help them progress on their own path.

Around that time, one of my mother’s boyfriends gave me a copy of “Jonathan Livingston Seagull” by Richard Bach. Being a visual person who LOVED the ocean and seagulls, I IMMEDIATELY connected with the story and the lessons contained in it.

It rocked my world, in a good way!

The message was of a young seagull who set out to be the best flier, who went off by himself to practice and learn, was laughed at by the flock who saw his efforts as futile, and then met other fliers far more advanced than he was from whom he extracted inspiration to keep going. He attracted a master teacher who led him along a journey that had subtly changed from being physical only to being very spiritual.

As a person who connected with LIFE TRUTHS at a very young age, I saw myself as Jonathan, and saw there were so many, many more levels to aspire to! This imagery about a life plan touched me deeply, and was something I kept inside of my heart as a beacon and to inspire me to continue learning, even during times which seemed doomed to failure!

Later when I was an art teacher in an inner city program in Montreal, the psychologist working with some of the kids was astonished that I had made breakthroughs with some kids he had been working with for YEARS! He was dumbfounded, and kept asking me “…but WHERE DO YOU COME FROM?My methods, of working INTUITIVELY with art to give the kids visual tools to express their inner souls resulted in them FEELING SAFE to be able to open up about what they were feeling.

My gifts were criticized by many in the two churches I attended and I received MANY corrective sessions where I was told point blank that it was impossible to “just know” something without having gone to school for it (and since I didn’t have a university degree it was obvious I couldn’t have learned that from school). JESUS didn’t work that way, I was told. He worked through the leaders in the church who passed the information downwards. If I wanted to know something I needed to ask a leader who would tell me the information.

My illnesses were seen (to them) as a sign that God was punishing me for my undisclosed sins. Since I couldn’t change (or WOULDN’T) I was then shunned.

Between the shunning and the corrective sessions, this created a painful brainwashing which led me to the point of not feeling I was worthy to breathe the air or to walk on the earth! That was a very dark time in my life.

It’s taken me years to heal from the damage of those days and I’ve just very recently found the courage to write publicly about them and to come to accept the INTUITIVE part of myself, which is a gift, NOT a curse!

Having not received support or acknowledgement in life, but rather discouragement for this gift, I’ve struggled to find my place in this world and to find my VOICE.

I’ve been through some severe emotional
and spiritual abuse in my life and have done the deep gut work it takes to move forward.

How did I accomplish this?

I wasn’t alone in my healing journey! The very first person who stepped into my life was my second husband, who I met at a church Christmas meal in a member’s home. I had gone there to mentally say goodbye to everyone (I had made my plans to leave this earth), and since I was being shunned, I was left alone to nurse a migraine in the front room. An old gentleman wearing a jacket with Native American designs in the fabric sat all by himself, completely left alone by people who were telling each other stories how they had “reached out” to people that week.

I was saddened to see that a stranger was sitting alone while the group rejoiced among themselves! It felt so hypocritical to me! So, I walked over to him to make him feel welcome in a home where he was being ignored! That’s when I heard the voice!

It came from above the left side of my head, sounded like a young male, “Is this my husband?” it said in a timid voice!

WHAT??? HUSBAND? No, no, NO!

I wasn’t in ANY head space to look for a husband! I was going to kill myself! I was confused and overwhelmed! Besides, he was OLD! Old enough to be my father!

(Just so you know, I’d NEVER heard a voice before, and I’ve never heard one since! Years later, I came to find out that my sister-in-law had heard a voice MANY years ago prior to meeting my second husband’s brother!)

When I walked over to him, he asked me why I was so sad! I was astounded! No one else had seen this or seemed to care! I started to cry! He asked me to tell him and so without telling him about my carefully laid plans, I gave a broad answer to him, to which he asked me if I’d like to meet with him to talk about how I might find work in the film industry as a storyboard illustrator. That was all the hook in the mouth that I needed.

Through what turned into a series of meetings, I learned he had Native blood, followed the Lakota spiritual pathway, had been trained by his spiritual brother Steve Red Buffalo to pour water in Inipi ceremonies (sweat lodges) and had been given permission by Lame Deer to pour water at the Odanak Reservation to help the people.

I was very scared of what I was learning, having been brainwashed that none of that was “Godly”, so I decided to just open up and learn about what IS!

By this time, my plans were laid aside and forgotten. He invited me to ceremonies, and as we grew closer together as friends he taught me more and more about Native American spiritual beliefs. I had come to the point of sitting beside him in ceremonies, and later when we moved to Tucson, Arizona it became my job to prepare the young Native American women who were looking to reconnect with their spiritual traditions as part of their healing in a drug and alcohol treatment center. What an incredible honor!

My second husband helped me see a different side of the Creator and the world through the ceremonies. (That marriage finally ended when I had gone to stay with my daughter to help her with the kids when the youngest was re-diagnosed with cancer, and he was screaming at me on the phone to get him more money, even though I was unemployed and in the hospital on an emergency visit with the baby. The baby is four and a half now and has been in remission for around three years!)

My decision to just BE OPEN TO WHAT IS, has led people to me, such as the 4 psychics (I tell about that below!), has allowed me to re-awaked the INTUITIVE gifts, which were encouraged and enhanced with the ceremonies, and which in turn helped me to fashion my own healing journey through ART and WRITING!

I’ve now become the CONDUIT,
the information source and the helper for other people to

3D Lemonade Book cover 72 dpi thumbnail no glowOn October 22, 2013 my book On Becoming a Lemonade Maker went live up on Amazon for sale as a Kindle eBook! This book represents many years in the making, not just the physical act of writing it, but of living through the events that shaped me, gave me grief first, then insight.

As you’ll read in the book, I had been approached in my life by FOUR psychics over the span of a few years, all of whom gave me almost IDENTICAL messages regarding my life’s purpose.

No, I’m not prone to approach them even now, because I feel I have enough to deal with without any additional burden of new information!

They each approached me, and explained who they were,
and that they felt compelled to give me a message.

They asked me if I had any questions to ask of them. Not to cross any lines, I was careful in how I worded my response, so I gave more open ended responses, such as “Tell me what I need to know”.

I was shocked to see as the incidents kept happening, albeit over the space of a few years, that the information was almost identical each time; they had told m:

I had agreed to all these trials and difficulties
before I came into this life.

Initially I didn’t believe in reincarnation, having been taught in church it didn’t exist. After the 2nd message I thought it was an interesting coincidence, but after the 3rd time I started to think I needed to start looking at it as a possibility, and by the 4th time of being told the same message, I realized that I needed to take it seriously, even if I didn’t understand all the implications of what I was being told.

I had also been told

I needed to write about what I was learning,
that my books (yes, it was plural!)

were important, and would serve to help some people.

Coincidentally around the time of the second or perhaps it was the third psychic, I traveled to Finland to sign the book contract for my illustrated children’s book “Cannelle in Her New Home”, which was printed bilingually in English and Finnish. No, I’m not Finnish, but it all happened through a close friend of my second husband.

While I was there, the Publisher’s son acted as our translator. Finnish is one of the most beautiful sounding languages I’ve ever heard, so light and melodic to the ear. Perhaps it’s also very poetic, and makes English translations sound so much better? Anyway, after I showed my Publisher some of the photos I had taken of flowering cacti in the desert around the city of Tucson, Arizona, where I was living at the time, he encouraged me to take the photos and compile them into a book and add some of my philosophical thoughts to the pages. (I’ll work on creating these books soon!)

His suggestion really floored me.
I hadn’t thought at that time I spoke any differently than most people,
or that my photos were on that level, but

his words inspired me to look at myself differently,
and to pay a little more attention to the messages the psychics had come to tell me.

I haven’t met other people who have had these same experiences,
and so I took those words to heart, did my best to write down and then to organize the thoughts into something coherent and readable.

I have a mild form of dyslexia, which affects me in two ways: numbers get transposed (which was terrible for getting parking tickets when the allowable parking times got mixed up!) and in writing: I’ll hear a full sentence or paragraph in my mind, while I may have written down only a part of it. Even after re-reading it, my mind can fill in the gaps, so it appears that it’s all there.

So, over the course of the years, as some parts aged, I was able to fill in those gaps in the writing and create a wonderful book. I’ve tried to really look at my life, what I’ve lived through, and pull out the lessons. I’m not sure at this point that I’ve captured all the lessons, and I’m still going through more of life (who isn’t *smile*) so I might have future editions to come out to add to the book!

To be sure I had to go through many difficulties in life to pull all these lessons from, but by turning to a combination of art (using images, abstract form as well as incorporating words) and writing, I was able to tap into deep inner truths, which I believe we all possess, BUT our inner barriers can prevent our spirits from accessing what our souls already know.

Why do we all need to go through these difficulties?

Yup, you guessed it… to break down those barriers and gain the information we NEED to progress upwards on our paths!

As an intuitive I’m here to extend a hand to you, to help you in a gentle and non-judgemental way to step up to this new pathway in your life!

My books and workshops are designed to help you work through deep issues, remove those old barriers and help you to discover YOUR OWN HIDDEN TRUTHS!

Get my book now! Amazon

Listen to the 1st 15 minutes from the AUDIO BOOK!

Buy button Paperback BookBuy button Audio BookBuy button eBook

You can read more about my background
on the About Tamara page!

Would you like to see my Art Resume? Click here!

Please let me know if you have any questions!

#Amazon,, #Kindle, #Kindle books, #On Becoming a Lemonade Maker, #Tamara Kulish, #social media, #Twitter, #Goodreads, #Pinterest




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